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B – Brothers

20 Apr

brothersI don’t believe an accident of birth makes people sisters or brothers. It makes them siblings, gives them mutuality of parentage. Sisterhood and brotherhood is a condition people have to work at. ~Maya Angelou

(revised and reposted from February 2009 @ Breathings of the Heart.com)

I am not sure what I thought my relationship would be with my brothers at this point in my life, but I never dreamed it would be as it is. We are seven years apart which means that I am 14 years older than my youngest brother. Growing up I had little to do with my middle brother, and being so much older I was more maternal to my youngest brother (considering the countless hours of babysitting). With seven years between us, we grew up as three siblings – each an only child. Fast forward to 2013. We are all adults (at least by age). We each have distinct personalities and have become great friends. It is quite amazing, even surprising.

We are shared characters in a myriad of “growing up” stories. Of Marc, I remember that he spent much of his time alone in his bedroom playing with Legos. Once, I blamed him for pushing me over causing stitches; a lie which to this day he has difficulty forgiving. Evan was the baby, but in order to coax him to behave I would scare him into thinking the police would come take him away if he didn’t do exactly as I wished. Funny thing is – it worked. I haven’t tried it recently, but have great doubts he would be as gullible now.

As Maya Angelou so eloquently penned, “brotherhood is a condition people have to work at” and we have. We are three unique people. Marc is pragmatic, Evan idealistic and me – somewhere in between.  As in any relationship we have made many concessions, overlooked little annoyances (sometimes BIG ones), and continually committed to strengthening our bond.

I often wonder what makes my relationship with my brothers so extraordinary (notice I did not say “perfect”). I can only surmise it can be traced back to our parents and the principles to which they believe children should be raised. Having a strong sense self, cultivating an ability to articulate your views, loving people for who they are and a strong commitment to God were the foundation of our upbringing.

These tenets are now the cornerstone of the relationship between my brothers and me. It is through these principles that we are able to disagree, encourage, irritate and hold each other accountable. Laughter, sarcasm, along with deep theological and moral discussions often clutter our conversations. It isn’t that we always agree, to the contrary, we often disagree, at times are disrespectful and inadvertently hurt the other (although NONE of us would admit to this – being hurt that is), but there has never been a time where we have allowed anything to sever our bond.

Some say a sister’s bond is extraordinary, but I say give me brothers any day.

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Posted in Aging, Family, Intentional Living, Slice of Life, Spiritual life

 

“A” is for Adoption

18 Apr

249846_10151297629455758_117341435_nOn our anniversary this year, I sat across from my husband of five years, looked him in the eye and said, “When we married, did you ever imagine we would have a “yours, mine and ours”?” To which he confessed that he did not, but also admitting that it was one of the most blessed decisions he has ever made.

Adoption seems to have become somewhat of an epidemic in my family—quite by accidental intention. My youngest brother and sister-in-law have been foster parents for years and now have a sibling group in their care that will likely become their forever family. My middle brother and I have supported their commission along the way, never realizing that God was beginning to direct our hearts in the same direction.

Marc (my middle brother) and his family welcomed Ru into their family and into all of our hearts, this past year through an overseas adoption. If you haven’t had the blessing of following Ru’s journey, you can do so HERE. The fact that Marc and Sandra’s decision to adopt Ru and our decision to adopt Brandon coincided is, in my opinion, by divine providence (this is another story for later).

Neither Kent nor I will ever forget the Sunday we first heard our son’s name spoken for the first time. We had no idea that from that utterance, God immediately began creating a bond in our hearts perfectly weaving His radical plan with our uncompromising obedience. Much as taken place since that day, but I can say with great assurance that I knew from the first time I heard his name that Brandon was going to be our son and we were going to be his forever family.

We began praying months before we actually met Brandon. It was Super Bowl Sunday 2012 that Brandon was first introduced to our family. Scared, alone and with little comprehension as to what was happening to him, Brandon timidly entered our lives and our hearts. Empowered by faith and great tenacity (little did we know that would be enough), we began living as a family.

God’s eternal blueprint for adopting us as sons and daughters is the heart of our earthly adoption of Brandon. Though I don’t believe every Christian is called to actually adopt an orphan, I do believe it is every Christian’s responsibility to support the mission of adoption in some manner. It is our birthright as God’s adopted sons and daughters.

Galatians 4:4-6 – But when the right time came, God sent his Son, born of a woman, subject to the law. God sent him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that he could adopt us as his very own children. And because we are his children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, “Abba, Father.”

Adoption is Timely – Just as God adopted us in the “right time”, so do adoptive families. It was in the “right time” that Brandon needed a family and the “right time” our family was ready to embrace him. God had prepared both of our hearts (predestined if you will) to accept the challenges and the blessing found in obedience.

Adoption is Costly – Our adoption by God was gained at tremendous cost. He paid the ultimate price by sacrificing his only son so that we would have the privilege to call Him “Abba Father”. Earthly adoption is also costly. Not only is there an immense financial cost in most adoptions, but an equal (if not greater) emotional cost, as well as a high expenditure of time and stress. Fortunately, coupled with great cost is that of greater reward.

Adoption is Unconditional – No where in this scripture does it state that we are God’s children only if we look a certain way, or until we mess up, or if we are acceptable to him. Adoption by God is unconditional. I can’t tell you how many times under oath we had to answer yes to the question, “Do you understand by adopting this child he has the same rights to inheritance as your biological children and that by adopting him he is a full member of our family?” – unconditionally without prejudice.  I think that’s why, when people ask me if Brandon is my “real” son, I get a little offended (as insulted as I can get anyway). My answer is always “YES, he is my son – unconditionally”. As I call my heavenly Father, “Abba”—Brandon calls us mom and dad. As God calls me his daughter, so I call Brandon my son.

Adoption is Transformational – No one, adopted by God, remains the same afterwards. His Spirit transforms us. We think differently, act differently, our potential to love grows; we are redefined. I have found our adoption of Brandon to be transformational as well. We are not the same family—we are not the same as individuals. Our roles have changed; values clarified and spiritual walk strengthened.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted in Adoption, Christianity, Happiness, Intentional Living, Reflection, Slice of Life, Spiritual life

 

“A” is for… Part I

16 Apr

a0022-000027ADHD

Yes, I have it—no, I don’t think it’s a big deal. Officially diagnosed when I was 11 (uncommon for the time), it wasn’t until jr. high that I finally began to understand, accept and adapt to the fact that my impaired attention and concentration was controllable if I understood how it affected my life and made intentional adaptations. It helped that my jr. high instituted what was called “modular scheduling” and we moved classes every 20 minutes an ADHD student’s dream.

The following are the ways in which my ADHD has been, and continues to be, apparent.

  1. I believe I received a “spanking” every Sunday while growing up. I couldn’t sit still or remain quiet during church. On the Sundays I didn’t receive a proper spanking, I was called down from the pulpit and forced to sit on the platform where my father could keep a proper eye on me. Yes, I was spanked—no, it didn’t scar me for life.
  2. I am the epitome of a multi-tasker. Even now,  I am watching an episode of Downton Abby, checking my Facebook on my iPad and writing this entry on my laptop.
  3. I am a teacher. A middle-school teacher at that. The perfect vocation for one with my “condition”.
  4. Often passion comes before common sense for us folks. Sometimes that works out and sometimes—not so much.
  5. I can identify another with ADHD from a mile away—and almost instantly create a bond of hyper-understanding.

 

ADOPTION

            See tomorrow’s entry.

 

AMAZON.com

Cleary, the bibliophile’s crack cocaine – and not so great an idea for one that tends to be impulsive (writes the one with 240 books on Kindle of which only half have actually been read).

 

ANXIOUS, things that make me

It used to be that not much made me anxious or at least not for very long. In May 2010, we were in a car accident in which we were hit from behind, on a two-lane highway. For the first time in my entire life, I became anxious beyond my control. I had difficulty riding in the passenger seat (not driving) and two-lane roads are especially difficult for me.

I don’t much like the helpless feeling of not being able to handle feelings of great fear. BUT, I refuse to allow fear to stifle me, so if I am not driving, I simply make sure my iPad is charged and keep myself otherwise occupied. I have also been known to go an hour out of the way to avoid two-lane roads. However–my counselor tells me it is getting better.

 

APPLE

iPhone; iPod Shuffle; iPad; MacBook; Apple TV—yes, we are an Apple family. Complete indoctrination—Steve Jobs would be proud.

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Posted in Adoption, Blogging, Books, Intentional Living, Slice of Life, Social networking, Technology, Writing

 

Orientation Almanac 2013

15 Apr

almanacAnn Rosenthal begins her Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life with what she calls an Orientation Almanac. It is an attempt to “orient” the reader with plain facts about American life during the time period the book was written. Her time period is that of 2000-2005 – mine is current – 2013. I will compare the two lists in an effort to orientate my reader to this current time. Rosenthal’s information is in parenthesis. Feel free to leave commits if I have omitted something you deem interesting. I apologize for the formatting–apparently WP doesn’t like Microsoft Word.

World Population

6.973 billion (6.16 billion)

 Top News Stories of the Past Year

Mass Shootings                                                (September11)

Sandy Hook Elementary                             (Dot-com bubble burst)

Aurora, Colorado movie theater             (Enron Scandal)

US Election – Obama Wins                         (Iraq War)

Superstorm Sandy                                        (Clinton and Lewinsky)

Obamacare                                                      (Harry Potter)

Libya – Sept. 11 assault in Benghazi              (Adkins Low-Carb)

Penn State – Jerry Sandusky scandal            (Gay Marriage)

US Economy

Fiscal Cliff

Gay Marriage

Countries in Power*

United States                                                 (United States)

Russia                                                                (China)

China                                                                  (Russia)

India                                                                   (England)

United Kingdom                                             (Germany)

France                                                                 (Japan)

*globalfirepower.com

To Whom Americans Attribute Power – This list remains the same from Rosenthal’s List

Movie Stars

Rock Stars

Sports Stars

Rich People

Major Political Figures

Cost of Living Averages

Stamp .46                                                                  (.37)

Pack of gum $1.50                                                ($1.00)

Quart of Milk $2.00                                             ($1.80)

Gallon of gas $3.50                                            ($1.90 – oh my!)

Loaf of bread $2.00                                           ($2.50)

Pack of cigarettes $6.19                                ($3.80)

Movie Tickets $8.00                                       ($9.25 – wow)

Hardcover Book $28.99                                ($24.95)

Average book download $9.99              (What’s a download?)

Pair of Levis $39.99                                   $32.00)

Confirmed Planets

Mercury

Venus

Earth

Mars

Jupiter

Saturn

Uranus

Neptune

Pluto  - Kicked out apparently

Highest-Rated Television Shows (definitely not my choices)

American Idol                                                            (Super Bowl)

Big Bang Theory                                                       (World Series)

Person of Interest                                                   (NBA Championships)

Dancing with the Stars                                            (Academy Awards)

The Voice                                                                   (The Sopranos’)

Castle                                                                           (American Idol)

NCIS                                                                           (Reality Television)

Modern Family

Ways We Exercise

Cross-Fit                                                                    (Jogging)

Zumba                                                                        (Biking)

Hot Yoga                                                                    (Spin Classes)

Running                                                                      (Treadmill)

Lifting Weights                                                       (Lifting Weights)

P90X                                                                          (Pilates)

Biking                                                                         (Yoga)

Common Signs – there are just a few new ones that were not prevalent in 2000 therefore were not on Rosenthal’s list

No Cell Phone or

Cell Phones on Silence

ISBO (For Sale By Owner)

Ped x-ing

Machines We Own – items not on Rosenthal’s list are underlined: those no longer applicable are x-ed out.

TV

Cell phone

Computer (Laptop most likely)

Gaming System (X-Box; Play Station; Wii)

CD Player

iPod

Tablet (iPad)

Washing Machine and Dryer

Dishwasher

Coffeemaker

VCR Player

DVD Player

Video Camera

Digital Camera

Microwave Oven

Popular Kids’ Names* – the trend back to “old-fashioned” names is interesting to me.

Aiden                                                                          (Jacob)

Jackson                                                                      (Michael)

Ethan                                                                          (Matthew)

Liam                                                                           (Joshua)

Mason                                                                        (Christopher)

Noah                                                                           (Nicholas)

Lucas                                                                          (Andrew)

Jacob                                                                         (Joseph)

Jaydon                                                                        (Daniel)

Jack                                                                            (Tyler)

Sophia                                                                        (Emily)

Emma                                                                         (Hannah)

Olivia                                                                          (Madison)

Isabella                                                                       (Ashley)

Ava                                                                             (Sarah)

Lily                                                                              (Alexis)

Zoe                                                                             (Samantha)

Chloe                                                                          (Jessica)

Mia                                                                              (Taylor)

Madison                                                                     (Elizabeth)

* http://baby-names.familyeducation.com

 The following are list I have randomly added instead of using Rosenthal’s.

Student Excuses (mostly for not having completed homework) – I made a new list of my own.

I had a game last night

I had too much homework.

Mom and dad were fighting.

Didn’t write it in my agenda.

There was homework last night?

Genuine (honest) answers for the question, “How are you?”

Stressed to the max!

So busy, I barely have time to answer your question.

Tired

Old

I should feel better than I do considering all that God has blessed me with.

Numbers and Codes We All Memorize

Phone number/home address

Cell phone number

Other’s phone number – though I must confess I don’t. They are stored in my phone.

Pin numbers

Social Security number

E-mail password

Acronyms that I, as an educator, deal with…*

PBIS

RTI

SST

TRS

IEP

MRI

ACT/SAT

ELA

ELL

NCLB

SIP

ADHD

ADD

IEA

MFEA

*I am sure I have missed a few

Common Slang

Sweet!

My bad – I personally HATE this one.

Sick! – in a good way

Epic fail!

Hater

Props

Sup

Common Texting Slang

YOLO

TBT

LML

IKR

LOL

ROFL

IMAO

TY

BFF

BTW

TTYL

IDK

Words that I most frequently use.

Seriously?

Excuse me?

I love you!

Choices you make today—affect tomorrow.

OK

Makes my head hurt!

 

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Posted in Slice of Life

 

An Ordinary Life

14 Apr

encyclopediaRecently, I began reading Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life by Amy Krouse Rosenthal. I did not choose to read this gem through my customary means: a friend did not recommend it and I had not read any book reviews pointing me to it’s value. I am an avid reader of contemporary writing teachers, Jim Burke, Nancy Atwell, Ralph Fletcher, Jeff Anderson and one of my favorites, Kelly Gallagher. It was while reading his newest book, Write Like This: Teaching Real World Writing through Modeling and Mentored Texts that I was introduced to Rosenthal’s writing. Gallagher’s pedagogy emphasizes the necessity of teaching students “real world writing” as apposed to “standard driven” instruction. He surmises that it is through modeling good writing and carefully examining superior writing, that accomplished writers are created (which is the goal of any writing teacher worth his/her salt).

Galagher introduces Rosenthat’s book as mentor text for students to practice  the “express and reflect” purpose of writing. In Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, Rosenthal uses the highly unorthodox encyclopedia format to compose her memoirs. She shares her lifetime remembrances alphabetically, composed in a standard encyclopedia entry. This idea fascinated me: to chronicle one’s life story through the alphabet seemed worthy of exploration. So, I downloaded the book and began reading.

The bond I have generated with Rosenthal’s writing was nurtured early in her book as she provides a disclaimer, of sorts, in the forward of her memoir. Rosenthal candidly admits that she was not “abused, abandoned or locked up as a child”. She did not live “in poverty or in misery” and that she is really quite ordinary. I, too, fall into the somewhat average category. My parents were great parents, I did fairly well in school, I was never beaten or neglected. Sadly, I didn’t even live up to the reputation most PK’s (preacher’s kid) have, for I have sinned far more as an adult than I ever did growing up in a parsonage. My one admission to living the extraordinary would be in facing the unexpected, and far too early, death of my husband after 24 years of marriage.

This past year, I have so neglected my writing that I longed for something to kindle the lost fire. So, I have made the decision to give Rosenthal’s idea a try. It is time to reenter the blogosphere.  For the next few months (my resolve ends with a timetable), I will attempt to capture and recollect the mostly mundane, but hopefully entertaining, quips, neurosis, snapshots and vignettes that have made up my 50 years on the earth.

This is my story.

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Posted in Blogging, Intentional Living, Reflection, Slice of Life, Teaching, Writing

 

Just Ask Mary

16 Dec

Here is the Advent devotional I wrote for my church’s series this Christmas season.

Luke 2:19seward_-_mary_&_baby_jesus
“But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.”
Devotional:
I have experienced the joy of giving birth twice. I remember every nuance of the nine months and delivery—every smell, every sound, every person who shared in the great event. I remember listening for the first breath coming from my child; counting his fingers and toes, and holding onto each moment as a special memory. Even though these memories are over twenty years old, I have treasured them in my heart and mind, never to be forgotten.

I can’t imagine the whirlwind life Mary had experienced up to this point. First, an angel told her she would give birth to the Son of God, and then she became pregnant-shamed that she was not married. Next, Joseph, who had to be overwhelmed with the prospect, obediently took Mary as his wife and while traveling to Bethlehem Mary gave birth in less-than-desirable conditions. This scripture finds Mary in a stable swaddling the Son of God and yet she was like any other mother. She cherished every moment and contemplated what had happened to her from the time the angel appeared until the birth of Our Lord. She treasured these memories as her story.

It is comforting to know that Mary had normal, human thoughts and emotions. But if you think about it, she was just an ordinary person commissioned by God for an extraordinary purpose. We are no different. We must take the time to contemplate our life circumstances, especially those that have strengthened our faith. Some life events are joyous, some sad, others bewildering but all jointly create our story. A story where God has taught us, guided us, and continues to remind us that it is He who creates the extraordinary from the ordinary. Just ask Mary.

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Posted in Christianity, Family, Happiness, Intentional Living, Reflection, Slice of Life, Spiritual life

 

Too Busy Not to Care

03 Nov

I don’t have time…

I am too busy…

I haven’t had time…

My plate is full…

Lately I have found my conversation littered with these statements or several variations thereof. I am attempting to eradicate such four-word axioms from my daily dialogue, but it isn’t easy. You see, I AM busy—I really DON’T have time—really.

At best, “I don’t have time”, is an excuse, and at worst a lie. Truth is, I have plenty of time for just about anything that I give priority. Even with laundry, homework help, three football games a week, a football dinner, full-time job, job-related meetings, church responsibilities and a partridge in a pear tree…I do have time.

Perhaps I am at the point where I need to be honest with myself and with others. Maybe instead of saying “I don’t have time” I should say what these four words really mean. Something like, “I haven’t (or won’t) make time to (insert what you are asking of me)”, or “I am such a terrible time manager that I have chosen to complete some inconsequential activity over (fill in the blank)”, or finally, “Sorry, I haven’t made (insert your request) a priority.” Yes, those would be more truthful statements.

This afternoon, broken ankle propped up on several pillows, I scoured the New Testament for just ONE instance where Jesus said that he didn’t have time or that he was too busy because if there were ever a man who had a “full plate” it would be Jesus. I failed to find one single incident where Jesus said, “Know what, I am so busy, I just don’t have time. Have you seen what I have to do today? I really would like to be involved in your life, but I don’t have time to minister to you, to engage in your life, or to break bread with you.” Seems silly to even phantom that Jesus would say such things. How then should we any different or require any less of ourselves?

The disciples, trying desperately to control Jesus’s social calendar, spoke out on Jesus’s behalf over and over again. They would tell crowds,  “He doesn’t have time! Step away so he can do important work.” (Luke 8:43-48). When Jesus stopped to interact with the woman who was healed after touching his garment, the disciples had a fit.  “Seriously, Jesus? There are so many people here. The crowd is huge. You don’t have time to stop for one woman. (Marsha paraphrase)” Jesus simply ignored the disciples. He stopped anyway; made the time; blessed the woman, because he knew that investing in this life had nothing to do with “time”.

I find solace in knowing that the disciples were just like me. It often took them two or three attempts to fully understand a truth Jesus was trying to convey. For example on this very same day, the disciples tried, once again, to intervene on Jesus’s behalf. A man name Jairus was hanging out with Jesus and the disciples (Luke 8:49-56) when Jairus received news that his daughter was dead. Again the disciples tried to interfere blurting, “Common, don’t bother the teacher anymore – can’t you see he’s busy. Have you seen all these people?”  Not only did Jesus have the time – he stopped what he was doing, went to Jairus’s house, took the girl by the hand and commanded her “My child get up.” I wonder if the disciples ever thought, at the end of the day, “We really are stupid. We are so missing what He (Jesus) is all about.”  You see, Jesus was about changing lives in a real way. He was, and still is, about relationships and love. He is about making time for things that matter not about having enough time.

If this is true,(believe me I wish I weren’t typing this right now) if we really do have enough time to do things that matter and if Jesus really IS our standard then shouldn’t we be enthusiastically contacting our children’s pastor, youth pastor, senior pastor, community coordinator and asking the question, “What is the job you have the hardest time filling?” with the reply of, “Sign me up”.

I want to change lives in a “real” way not in a “comfortable’ way. Not in some manner that protects my “comfort zone”, but in ways that stretch who I am and who God designed me to be. This requires me to let go of the control of my time. It requires that I understand my “time” is not mine in the first place, but God’s. It means that I no longer can disregard valuable service to others over the boundaries of “time”.

“I can’t add another thing to my plate.” Well, you know what? If I scoot the peas over and stack up the mashed potatoes there is an open spot. If I pile the green beans and put the roll on top of the turkey—there is room. Right in front of me is an empty spot on my plate, one that is waiting to be filled with the meaningful and significant, with potential to enrich another’s life, and in return create greater joy within mine.

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Brokenness Restored

01 Nov

I went through the early years of my childhood needing stitches every six months, but no broken bones. When kids would come to school with casts on their arm or leg; I thought it was a bit glamorous. They seemed to get preferential treatment; lots of attention—heck, they got to go to lunch early. Even now, at the middle school where I teach, students are given the “key” to the elusive elevator if a leg, ankle or knee is out of commission. Glamorous, right?

It took me 50 years to experience a broken bone, however there was nothing glamorous when my ankle twisted under my body as I hit the ground at the bottom of the stairs. As is often the case, my mind was somewhere else while descending the stairs in my home. I was sure my foot was grounded on the final step, but I was wrong. I tumbled, albeit gracefully, and ended up in a heap at the bottom of the stairs. Knowing instantly life was not going to be the same for the next few months, I attempted to arise from my fallen state.

After a thrilling few hours at the local emergency room, my greatest fear was confirmed. Along with my pride, my fibula was broken. After a short crutch tutorial, I was on my own to amble about with this most awkward form of transport. Let’s just say I was cursing myself for not beginning that weight bearing, upper-body workout I had intended to start months ago. Maneuvering the crutches seemed not only impossible for my weak body, but a huge blow to my ego. I thought to myself, “How can I possibly live this way for eight weeks?” With leg wrapped in a splint, crutches in hand and a Monday morning appointment to the orthopedic surgeon, I headed home.

Upon arriving home feeling bit overwhelmed, I did the only thing a socially connected 21st century gal could do.  I posted by misfortune on Facebook. Immediately folks began to reply to my veiled plea for sympathy, reassurance and commiseration. Within a few moments, a post caught my attention-one that was sure to alter my crushed spirit. A friend stated that when she had broken her ankle the doctor had prescribed a knee scooter. Knee scooter? I had never heard of such a thing, but even the thought made me smile. With urgency, I sent out a plea to anyone who might have one of these magical vehicles that I could try for a few days. Within minutes, a neighbor messaged that she had one for me to borrow. Eureka!

As soon as the scooter was delivered and I placed my leg with its pathetic-booted ankle on the seat, I began to feel a sense of liberation. With one knee up on the scooter I could maneuver around the house at a speed rivaling Mario Andretti. Suddenly, my world opened up again. The possibilities were unlimited, and my condition did not seem as bleak. Freedom was restored along with something I had lost along the way—dignity tempered with hope.

I know the journey of the next few weeks will not be easy. I know that I will have days of discouragement mixed with days of great accomplishment. What creates confidence that my situation is not quite as dire as I first anticipated, is my ability to acquire the tool paramount to making my day easier—one that will afford me opportunities to “scoot” along this path of recovery with a bit more ease and confidence.

I have been up and down the stairs in my home a million times. I know the rhythmic pattern to each step: the rise of each rung and the cadence by which I can progress up and down effortlessly, even in the dark. Yet this one time I became distracted, and totally missed the mark. It wasn’t on purpose—I just wasn’t paying attention.

This staircase, connecting the floors in my home, is not that much different than life. We live our lives day after day with a sense of security. Our journey becomes familiar and we become experts in the voyage, then one day, we become distracted; we aren’t paying attention. Something happens that totally rocks the world we are so acquainted with, and the life we have maneuvered so well for so long is suddenly shattered. We begin to feel hopeless, discouraged, and sometimes despondent. What we fail to realize, is that within our desperation—God is the “life scooter” we need to maneuver through our recovery. The God of the universe reminds us that true liberation and freedom comes only through him, and by leaning totally on His strength we can begin to heal, restore and be fully renewed.

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Posted in Christianity, Intentional Living, Reflection, Slice of Life, Spiritual life

 

On Honoring the Sabbath

23 Sep

Today is Sunday, September 16, 2012—the Sabbath for Christians.  Over the past few months, I have tried to live more deliberately—at least where the Sabbath is concerned. While my desire is to live more “intentionally”, I don’t want to be trapped by “legalism”, so I have tried to remove myself from electronics for this one day of the week—at least from “sundown to sundown”: in order to be more present in my worship. I still have dedicated time to read and write on the this day; I just don’t have the distraction of my phone, iPad or computer.

Another change I have made is that I make every attempt to plan the Sabbath before the day arrives. This is, in fact, very liberating. I no longer find myself wondering, during the Sunday morning service, where we will eat or what we will eat—it has already been determined; most likely around the family table—something that is rare at our home these days.

Finding words to express how these purposeful actions have transformed our family—is not possible. Every week I feel more connected and immersed in the lives of my kids and my husband, because of sharing one “intentional” meal together. We laugh, connect, support and hold each other accountable at the same time.

Often we share the Sabbath table with friends and family, most often buddies of the kids and my nephew, Eric. Their friends are eager (if not forced) accomplices in our time together. Not speaking for them, but I think there is a certain harmoneous connection when the day is shared.

Additionally, we have found that simple rituals, such as lighting special “Sabbath” candles, create a climate of honor. We understand that these rituals have no significant “magical” qualities, but are gentle reminders that God IS the light of the world and that our lives reflect His love.  Sharing our Sabbath meal is meant to be a time to impart blessings and embrace thankfulness.

When evaluating the many changes our family has made over the past six months, this is one that, I believe, is of most value. Living intentionally has meant making choices “on purpose”; making choices that create a more meaningful life for our family. My challenge to you is to look at your week and find a place for a “Shabbat”  for your family—a time to rest, rejuvenate and recharge.

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Posted in Christianity, Intentional Living, Reflection, Slice of Life, Spiritual life, Theology

 

On Turning 50

02 Sep

Since turning 50 on July 30, 2012, I have started to write at least four posts with the intention of reflecting on the experience. None of them quite “hit the mark”. This past week, my 6th grade students and I closely read the poem “On Turning 10″ by one of my favorite poets, Billy Collins. So as a tribute to him, as a mentor text to my students and as a celebration of turning 50–here are my thoughts…

 

On Turning 50*

The whole idea makes me feel like I’m riding a jolting roller-coaster spiraling down the rails
or the rush of wind as it hits
my face and is suddenly gone,
a kind of haunting at sunrise
a spring in the middle of winter.
I know it is time to think of looking back,
but I know it’s too soon.
The dance is not yet
in it’s final moments.
But I find myself doing so
just the same.

At the dawn of adolescence
I reached for life
I dreamed.
At 20 I was newly married, at
30 a mother
At 40 experienced loss,
a solemn darkness
to overcome.

But now I am mostly dividing
my thoughts
Some yearning for what is in the past knowing the sum of life’s story somehow equates gratification. This is the beginning of life
in some sense.
Time to say good-bye to regrets and guilt.
Time to embrace the next chapter.
It seems only yesterday I believed that
life was boundless,
limitless
But now reflecting,
I know
it’s simply
splendid. I exhale.

*Inspired by On Turning Ten by Billy Collin

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Posted in Aging, Intentional Living, Reflection, Slice of Life, Writing

 
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